Thursday, April 19, 2007

I saw ducks coming in for a landing on the water. They had timed it just right, so that they slid to a stop just a couple of feet from the bank.

I wondered if they ever misjudged the distance, and slid into the rocks that line the sides of the river. I suppose if they did, they wouldn't be so brave. Then I wondered how they learn to fly.

We learn by doing, and not just by doing, but by doing something new -- something that takes us out of our comfortable surroundings. If we are content to repeat yesterday in today's time frame, then we do not learn anything.

Occasionally, we misjudge things, and wind up in the rocks. That is the point of decision - either we will never try anything new again, staying safe, or we will continue to take risks, and continue to learn - occasionally landing on the rocks now and again.

Choosing for comfort is a way of avoiding the truth; choosing for discomfort simply exhibits a tendency to masochism. Learn, or not - that is the real choice -- comfort will follow, or it will not, but that is not important.

Now, substitute the word "live" for "learn" in the previous paragraphs.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

There is a place where dreams and waking intersect.

In the brief moment, the mind overlays the fulfillment of the dream with the yearning of reality, and the soul is allowed to experience joy or sorrow without the restrictions we've learned to place on our deepest feelings.

It is in this place, where we cannot hide from ourselves, although we usually try to do so.
However, if we accept what we feel, and explore the feelings, the potential exists for the dream world to enter reality, the long-surpressed desire becomes real -- and life enters a surreal state.

But we so rarely get to that point, lacking the courage and bravery to make the changes we know are necessary, accepting the comfort of the familiar, being afraid of the unknown.

I am walking the unknown, deep in the intersection of dreams and reality.

I am alive.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

She, pt. 2

She came back. I should have known, should have believed.
I will never doubt again.

Monday, April 9, 2007

She

She walked down the lane.
The sun shone through her hair, her face radiant.
Her white dress flowed in the Summer breeze.
She looked like an angel.
I watched her walk, and just before she turned to go into her house,
She looked back at me, and smiled, and waved.
I didn't know how dead I was until I was alive again, at that moment.

Another time, we walked together, down the lane.
We stopped and ate an orange, some grapes.
She laughed like the world was made just for her,
And I think, maybe, it was.
I believed that even a day with her would be worth a lifetime without.
And, although I had lost hope and faith,
I found hope again, because I had life again...
And I had faith that this was how things were supposed to be.

She walked away -- said goodbye, and explained it all.
And I am quite sure she is wrong.
But I cannot tell her, for she will not listen.
This is what I feared most, and did not know how to prevent.
The payment for those few days has come due, and I am bankrupt.

I remember the last time she walked down the lane.
The sun was shining on her hair again, and she still looked like an angel.
If I had known at that time, I would have held her tighter...
I would not have let her go. But she is gone.
I still have hope, somewhere, if I can find it.
But my faith is shattered, and the life that came back, has disappeared.